Breaking up is hard to do. Regardless of whether or not you’ve slept with the ex. In fact, some of my hardest breakups are with people I’ve never even kissed, let alone held hands with. You know what we have done though? Spent countless hours discussing a period versus a punctuation mark, and wondered about the implications of a forward written by this person or that. I’m talking of course about RE:BOOKS authors. And sure, an author isn’t a boyfriend. I don’t sleep with them, they’re not obligated to join dinners with my extended family, or talk me off a ledge when Uber Eats delivers the wrong order. But we do share an experience that few humans can understand.

I’ll admit the RElationship I build with RE:BOOKS authors is rare. Most authors can’t get their publishers on the phone, let alone grab a bite together. When I created RE:BOOKS, a main goal of mine, along with publishing inspiring memoirs, was to break with the traditional model of the impenetrable publishing house. I wanted to create a haven for authors where they’d feel valued and respected. And I knew a huge part of that was the time I could provide to my authors (along with my personal phone number). So we reach the “just text me” level of relationship pretty quickly, and the “OMG did you see this?” level even faster. By the time an author’s book hits shelves, we’re talking multiple times a day, seeing each other constantly at book signings and events, and I have their coffee order saved in my Starbucks app.

I think a large part of the connectedness we develop has to do with the books I choose to publish. I work primarily with memoirs, and the majority of these are from women sharing the most vulnerable aspects of their lives, from eating disorders, to the near-death of a partner, personal finances, and the rocky seas of newly married life. What I mean by all this is, we go deep. There has to be depth to our relationship for my authors to trust me to help share these intimate memoirs. So right from the get-go, I’m learning things about them that they’ve never shared with anyone else. 

But unlike romantic relationships, the relationship between a publisher and author has an end date. Or at least a “go dormant” date between books. We slowly have less and less to discuss each day, until suddenly we haven’t spoken for a month, and…I miss them. I’m noticing what they’re up to through Instagram, I’m seeing who they’re out to lunch with, and catching books they’re reading at the cottage, and a part of me is thinking, “Why didn’t they tell me about that book they’re reading? Why didn’t they invite me out for an Aperol Spritz on a patio?” I read books! I drink drinks! Why not ME? 

Before becoming a publisher, I daydreamed about discovering unbelievable stories, and beautiful voices. I dreamed about the magic of handing an author the very first copy of their book, and witnessing the moments when readers tell authors how much their book means to them. I dreamed about book signings, press events, and book fairs. 

I never dREamed about getting dumped.

But I think I’ve found the solution to my broken heart: sequels.