“Only when you have to choose a baby name do you realize how many people you hate”

— RE:BOOKS

My daughter’s name is Abbie. Well, it’s Abigail. I knew that I wanted to call her Abbie but also wanted to give her a chance to use her name the way she’d like to, so I gave her a full name with the option of a nickname.

A lot goes into naming a baby. However, you must consider certain implications when you are naming a human.

Some things I considered were:

1) A name that anyone in the family can pronounce, PLUS a name that strangers can pronounce. 

For this, I always imagine being called into a doctor’s office. People always mispronounced my name until about 2003, when it broke into the top 100 names in North America (though not unique in my native country Israel). Now, whenever I’m in public and hear someone calling my name, or their child’s name, I always turn my head. I can’t wait until the name “Maya” drops into obscurity again and the kid Mayas become adults, so my neck can get a break.

2) I considered names that no one could use to mock the child. No offence to Gwyneth Paltrow, but a name like Apple is an invitation for mean girls to be, well, mean!

3) I was considering names that would honour some people from my family who meant a lot to me and have passed on. I wanted a unique name but one that is also known. I would be okay with a name that landed in the top 100 that year.

And finally,

4) The name had to roll off the tongue.

When it came down to naming my child, I filled about ten pages in a notebook with potential names and name combinations, and though I had some good ideas, not one looked or felt right. Until one day, I observed a lady creating birth announcements on those old Kodak picture machines. I glared at the screen where she typed the name ‘ABBY’ in bold red letters. And I just knew – this was her name. It was like she sent me a message from deep inside my abdomen, and if you knew my kid, this would make sense because she’s been choosing everything for herself since day one.

But her name did not meet some of my criteria, specifically the unique name requirement. The year she was born, the name Abbie, Abby, or Abigail came in as the 7th most popular name that year. In fact, until 2018, it spent 17 years in the top 10, and it’s still floating in the top 20 today.

Having a popular name has its pros and cons. I can walk into any souvenir shop and find a trinket with her name on it. People usually spell her name wrong (with a ‘Y’), but everyone knows how to pronounce it properly. 

It’s an easy, playful name but having a popular name is not always easy.

In her first years at school, she was one of a few Abigails. I had a similar experience at school in Israel. There were three Mayas in my grade that had a total of 30 people. So, our teachers and peers called us by our full names. 

Growing up, my mother and her best friend were both named Susan, and people distinguished them as “Big Susan” and “Small Susan.” Of course, you couldn’t get more politically incorrect with that these days, but their name was consistently in the top five when they were in school! 

Because of political correctness and privacy rules, things are different for my Abbie. This is the first year there are no other Abbies in her class, but there are two others in her grade of 150 kids. So that’s one Abbie for every 50 children, compared to my one Maya among ten students.

I reached out to a couple of elementary school teachers to ask how they differentiate between kids with the same name, and they both had the same solution Abbie’s teachers have – to attach the initials of their last names. For years, my daughter has been known as ‘Abbie K.,’ our old neighbour is ‘Olivia M.,’ and one of their other little friends is ‘Isabella A.’

I asked the teachers if they confuse children with the same name, and the answer was a resounding: “Not at all.” After getting to know the children, their individuality leads over their names, and the simple addition of an initial causes less confusion. In high school, teachers don’t use any method to distinguish between same-name students—their uniqueness is enough.

I’m often asked why I gave my daughter a ‘top 10’ name, and the answer is that I simply like the name, and it was a good fit. It still is – I couldn’t see her with any other name. And trust me, she carries it very well in the uniqueness of her character that she doesn’t need any moniker or initial attached to it.

P.S. Check out the article Rebecca wrote about Baby Naming Consultants here! (Yes. It’s a thing!)

P.P.S. We would love to hear your story about baby naming, especially if you chose a “bestseller” baby name! Reach out and share with us here!