RE:ading vs. radishes
The (surprising) similarities between working at Loblaws and Indigo — and things customers say that you just cannot make up
Having worked at a grocery store for twenty-five years (yes, 25!) I’ve had the pleasure and, at times, displeasure of interacting with lots of different personalities, which — let me tell you — came with addressing some pretty odd requests and inquiries now and again.
True, I’ve had some nice, really cool conversations with people at the cash register. Other times, though, I've thought, “Everyone should be forced to work in retail, so they know how they should treat humans.”
I recently reconnected with a former colleague, who also had retail experience working at Canada’s largest book retailer: our beloved Indigo.
Turns out, working in retail is retail. You need patience! (“I don’t own the store. I don't make the store policies. I have no control of the price. I don’t know why we don't shelf that item. But, sure, go ahead and yell at me!”)
And you need a sense of humour. “Um, I asked you nicely to swipe your card again because it didn't work the first time — not because I’m trying to charge you twice.”
So, as I reconnected with my former retail associate at Indigo, our exchange of pleasantries quickly turned into recounting our favourite stories from the days “behind the desk.” (Keep scrolling to see weird things people say in bookstores…they are hysterical.)
It made me consider the differences between working at Loblaws and Indigo. I was surprised to find out that the similarities outweighed the differences:
Red Book vs. White Jar (Tomato, Tomahto)
One of my absolute favourite requests ever is that uber-vague inquiry about a certain product, using the most ambiguous details. These are real-life occurrences at BOTH grocery stores and bookstores.
Customer at Loblaws: “I’m looking for that sauce that’s so good in a white jar…”
Customer at Indigo Bookstore: “I’m looking for that book by that author. The title starts with an E, I think?”
At this point, we’d ask close-ended questions to get more details:
Me at Loblaws: Is this a sauce you want to use for cooking something specific? Is it for pasta? Is it for salad? For meat?
Friend at Indigo: Do you know if this book is fiction? Is it romance? Mystery?
And when that doesn’t get us any further, this is what goes through our heads:
Me at Loblaws: Starts walking towards the sauce aisle, mentally scanning all the sauces I’m actually familiar with…
Friend at Indigo: Starts wandering around aisles with popular titles, scanning names of ‘E’ authors she recognizes…
This process takes time —that’s also why we tend to walk fast. More often than not, we can and do figure out what product or book is sought. It’s like witchcraft.
In my instance, that sauce the customer was asking for was tahini, which was not in the sauce aisle at all. But I managed to snag a “bravo!” from my manager for creative thinking.
Meanwhile, my friend’s answering phones and responding to inane questions like, “Is this a bookstore?” and dealing with customer queries like, “I don’t remember the title. It was about a family, and I saw it on the Globe and Mail’s bestsellers list about 3 or 4 months ago…”
Kk.
RE:turns and RE:funds
Fun times at the customer service counter! Yes, customers do return watermelons. And, yes, customers (try) to return books. Can you imagine the nerve to return a book that was clearly read (um, it’s pretty clear you were reading this in the bath while eating chocolate) and expect a full refund?
At Loblaws, books and magazines are final sale (but we do have a satisfaction guarantee, where we will take back a store brand product that wasn’t “enjoyed.”
Indigo has a similar policy with Heather’s Picks, where you can get a full refund if you didn’t enjoy it. I don’t believe I’ve ever not liked a Heather's Pick, but taste is subjective.
That being said, I don’t exactly enjoy being yelled at because you’re trying to return a product from Metro…and we’re at Loblaws. (It happens. For real!)
OverheaRE:d at the RE:gister
The best interactions are at the cash. I love chit-chatting with people, and working behind the cash register is the perfect place to do so. (It’s incredible how much information you can get in one to three minutes from a stranger!)
Some of the best meals I’ve had were recommended by customers during check-out (like an amazing roasted radish recipe I recently tried). I’ve also had customers recommend cookbooks to me, and likewise.
I’ve actually formed lasting relationships with some customers, usually over a bestseller they’ve picked up. Which is why I’m a little envious of bookstore associates in general — being able to talk about books all-shift long, get and give recommendations, and share in their love of reading...
Then again, I remember my Indigo friend saying she’s had customers rearrange books right after she’s arranged them, and heard parents telling their children, “Don’t worry about knocking that stack over. They have people to pick those up.”
Once, someone asked her, “Who wrote the Bible?” Another time, a customer asked for a “clean copy” of the book, saying, “Someone's written in this,” to which her response was, “Yes, the actual author signed the book.” And she still wanted a clean copy. Sigh.
RE:gulars and RE:lashionships
Speaking of forming relationships, my Indigo friend attests that working at a bookstore is far more rewarding for someone who loves to read (a no-brainer), because everyone who walks through the door is likely there for a book (they’ve got super cute home décor!). Though, not all Indigo shoppers are book-savvy; I’ve heard tales of customers coming into Indigo and asking for the book “Pride," as well as the second installment, “Prejudice.” Cringe.
But when bookish meets bookish, magic happens, am I right?! And this is even more prevalent with customers who visit the store regularly. But she also has had incidents with customers coming in, talking to her about a book for 45 minutes, and then leaving without it.
Or once, this actually happened (she swears): A man walked up to her and said, “I’d like to buy a book for my wife,” and when asked what book, he responded, “I don’t know. Something with a pink cover. She likes pink.”
What’s always nice to hear from any customer is how satisfied they are. At Indigo, clients are eager to share how they’ve enjoyed a book recommendation from a staff member. Some pop in every other day just to say hello to the staff. When they have “staff picks,” my friend has had customers ask, “Sarah recommends this book. Is she in today?”
They say retail is retail, and they are correct. But a job in retail is usually viewed as a negative experience. While there are of course times that are difficult — like any other job — the good moments shouldn’t be taken for granted, and I truly believe there’s something to gain from every experience. I love my job at Loblaws, mostly because I enjoy the customer interactions.
Even when they do ask, “You know, that sauce?"
My friend feels the same about her time at Indigo, even when customers led with, "I don't remember the title, but it was red…or maybe green?”
So, I hope that next time you’re at the grocery store, you can exchange recipes or product recommendations with the cashier, and that when you’re at your local bookstore, you find a new and exciting read you might not have otherwise picked up.
* * *
Just for fun, here’s a list of other strange customer asks, thanks to Weird Things Customers Say in Bookstores by author Jen Campbell, who worked as a bookseller for 10 years!
Customer: “Do you have any books signed by famous authors who are likely to die soon? I'd like to make an investment.”
Customer: “Do you have any signed copies of Shakespeare plays? From the actors?”
Customer: “I’ve forgotten my glasses, could you read the beginning of this book to me to see if I like it?”
Customer: “What books could I buy to make guests look at my bookshelf and think, “Wow, that guy’s intelligent?’”
Customer: “This book sounds good. Do you know if there’s a movie version?”
Customer: “Do you have the new book by Charles Dickens?” (He hasn’t published a book since the 19th century!)
Customer: “Where in the book does it tell you how many pages there are?”
Customer: “Can books conduct electricity?”
Customer: “Do you have any secondhand crosswords? I love crosswords, but they're so difficult.”
Customer: “My children are climbing your bookshelves. That's ok, isn’t it? They won't topple over, will they?”
Customer: “I'd like to buy your heaviest book please?”
Customer: “I need a really awful book to give to someone I hate. Any recommendations..?”
Written by: Maya B.